Hey everyone !!! I'm BACK !!!!!

Anyone misses me during my absence for 2 weeks? Haha. Ok, i think i know the answer. Anyway, i've been "enjoying life" for the past 2 weeks in a local "offshore island holiday resort" call Pulau Tekong. Haha. Life there is "fun". Shall go back and enjoy the fun this sunday evening, i.e. tml. Anyway, for those of you who think i will die in tekong or something, i reassure you this is NOT cmh's ghost typing this blog entry. So plz dun send me any offerings this qing ming fest. Haha, joking. Ok, currently botak now...hav to wear a cap everywhere i go. Haiz...2 weeks of honeymoon period is over, welcome to HELL as for now!!!

OMG !!! I couldnt believe this, I AM ON NATIONAL RADIO !!! First time man. I happened to be listening to radio 913 (SPH Unionworks english station) and they have this Singapore's Most Wanted daily top 10 chart. So I sms in to vote for Welcome To The Black Parade by My Chemical Romance. Then after a while my handphone rang and which i picked up, the person on the line is the DJ, Jeremy Rathnam. Yup, those who found his name familiar, he was from power 98 previously, came over to 913 weeks ago. Anyway, he asked for my name and particulars and announced i wont myself a pair of tickets to catch the movie The Pathway (which i dunno wad e heck izzit about). Anyway, i also won myself a tshirt. But then i enlisting soon, this fri infact, so dunno wad to do wif the prizes. Haha. But anyway, he ask me to "be the DJ" for a few second announcing the 7th place song on the chart and i am like okay...haha...and i tried to act excited. And then i hav to say "at no. 7 is fergalicious on singapore most wanted" and something. Then he prerecorded it and play it juz b4 the song!!! OMg !!! I was still at a shock. Lol. A little surprize juz b4 enlistment.

Went for NUS Open house this morning. It wasnt as happening as NTU's one. But anyway, i managed to get somemore indepth info about the courses i am interested in. I shd be applying online tmr or something. Have to do it fast before i enlist this coming fri. Anyway, juz now at NUS open house when i was on board this campus tour bus for science route, the student guide who speaks thru the bus' microphone to intro the campus sounded very much like my AJ Chem teacher, Mrs Kuah!!! Omg, the pronounciation and stuff all almost the same. Walau i was like laughing throughout the whole bus journey. Not that i am bad laughing at pple's english but i laugh bcoz it brings back lotsa wonderful memories in AJC 2205 chem lessons and lectures. Omg, you guys (tutucians) shd hav board that bus and listen for urself. The whole bus pple were like giggling and laughing nonstop lor. So bad rite? Haha. The pot calling the kettle black. Anyway, one prof for nus chem eng asked me to attend the course talk instead of asking him questions...i am like...you know...hahahah!!! Get to hear from students that chem eng is a super duper competitive course, more competitive than i've expected. Most of the students that got in are those S paper distinctions one...straight As??? No hope. Haiz...i was like kena poured cold water sia. Sian... Oh yes, after the NUS open house i took MRT to bugis si ma lu to meet my parents coz they want to bring me to pray for safety since i am going NS very soon. Then on my way to si ma lu guan yin temple i hav to walk thru bugis village rite. Then as u guys noe in the mids of it got one sex shop. When i pass by that sex toy shop rite, i saw this ah pek prob in his late 60s or 70s peering thru the glass windows looking at the sex shop's display for a very long time and then i was like thinking...okay...yah...*eyes roll*. Hahahahaha

I dunno what happened, my left knee actually hurts. Actually its not the knee to be exact, its some point above the knee about 15cm to the left or something. Maybe i sprained my muscle but i didn really do any vigorious exercise recently. Except that i went swimming on tue. Weird. The pain only set in yesterday... Hope its nothing...

Haha. This is the first post ever since i've gotten back my A lvl results on 2nd mar, fri. I can still recall how nervous and tense i was that day, some point of times i was almost at the brink of tears. The moment the principal announced that 67 students didn make it for GP, i was even more anxious for i fear i'm one of the casualties. When the top students were announced one by one...my heart almost stop beating...but alas, as expected i was not on the list. When i was queuing up to get that piece of results slip that determines my fate, i was too freaked out that i give a black face. Tears almost flowed up. And when the girls infront took a long time collecting their slips (i'm not complaining yeah), every additional seconds of waiting made me even more petrified. At some point of times i almost feel like walking out of e hall because i think i couldnt take the pressure anymore. But then, too quickly yet to slowly, its my turn to face reality. The moment i saw my results slip on the table, i was too scared to read it. I quickly scanned through it...i didn do as bad as i've expected. But i still dare not believe whats on the piece of paper. It took me a while to digest reality. The moment i saw my GP grade i had a sigh of relief...C5...i passed but not too gloriously. And then what came to my mind next is...will i be jeopardized by my GP grade in entering my desired course. Afterthat, i had mixed feelings, neither happy nor sad. I think i screwed my GP...i dare not face my GP teacher...i stood aimlessly in the hall filled with a mixture of joy and laughter. I juz dunno what to do next... ...

Tomorrow is the day...doomsday...judgement day. I'm scared. Yes, tml 2nd March 2007 is the day I will be getting back my A lvl results. I am real afraid to face reality. Since last year I've this very bad feeling I will screw up my A lvls. I knew it, when i sat for the A lvls, things werent as smooth as it is during prelims. My flow of thoughts were hindered at times during the examination due to the additional amount of stress i've gave myself being in the national examination. I dont know. I think i screwed my GP, i screwed physics, i screwed chem, i screwed everything! GP being i did an extremely difficult essay question which i have no confidence in passing. I think i wrote out of point, but thats the only question i have some knowledge for examples. Then comprehension...AQ is a killer. I dont know, i think i cant make it for GP. I am real scared. If i fail GP i wont get a complete cert. It will also act against me when i apply for courses in Uni. Then another thing is my physics and chemistry. I dont know why but i think i did badly for both. Both are my strong subjects, but during A lvls, i think i didn perform up to standard. I have no confidence in getting A for both subjects. I really want to get A for both subjects coz i dont want to let down on my phys n chem tuition teachers. They hav high hopes on me, i dont want to disapoint them. Especially chemistry, i heard my father persuaded my tuition teacher for a long time b4 she agreed to coach me. Another then physics...his students have a track record of scoring As...i dont want to be the first one to break his record in the bad way. I know that the results are fixed. The results slips are already printed. There is no point for me to worry but i am really nervous, scared, worried. At some points i was at the verge of tears due to over depression and worry. I want to make it for the exam. I've appeared as one of the top scorer in class hence people hav expected me to do well and say there is no need to worry. But i want to confess that because pple expect me to do well due to my past records, then i have additional pressure on me. People expect me to do well, hence i must do well. I cant imagine the embarrassment of not doing well when others expect me to. More importantly, i cant handle the self-blame and what others view of me. I dont want to disapoint others, neither do i want to disapoint myself. I am real scared...i want to cry...